Tuesday, November 3, 2015

Taking care of you, too

" We must not confuse the command to love with the disease to please. And it’s not just because of the vicious cycles of people pleasing, although that’s part of it. I miss Best Yes opportunities sometimes because I simply don’t know they’re part of the equation. I get all twisted up in making the decision to check either the Yes or No box, not realizing there is a third box that reads Best Yes. "
- Lysa Terkeurst 

Good rainy afternoon ! I've been reading Lysa Terkeurst's book, The Best Yes, off & on for several weeks. I decided to do a leadership project based on the book, and revisited previous chapters. The above quote really stands out to me. Many of my friends refer to me as a "mom" . I like things strict, tidy, and definite. Those who know me , know how I hate to say "no." I hate feeling like I disappointed someone or like I'm missing out on something. I have people pleased a really large part of my life away. I want people to like me and want to hang around me. I want people to know I'm there for them, but way too often I forget about myself. I forget about what the command to love is and I get so wrapped up in trying to fix everyone and everything else that I feel drained and worthless. When you feel as if you're barely getting by, it is hard to move forward yourself, much less accelerate others. The problem I have realized is that I work myself up about all that is on my plate. The funny thing is that many things, I simply cannot do anything but pray about. I look at my planner and make to-do lists, but quickly get overwhelmed with it all. I victimize myself so much complaining about how tired I am and how life is unfair. I picked The Best Yes because of the subtitle, " Making Wise Decisions in the Midst of Endless Demands." That screamed my name! In college , I feel like I'm being pulled in a thousand different directions. From six classes to church services to family conflicts to friendships fading and coming to clubs and bible studies, plus simply being an eighteen year old on her own .. I feel like I could use all the wise decisions I could get. It has always been hard for me to take responsibility over myself instead of trying to fix everyone around me. I cover up what I know my soul needs with trying to please everyone then burn out. It is easy to focus on someone else's problems instead of my own. But, I've learned that if I'm not pouring into myself, I end up with nothing to pour. I'm not saying don't be with people, but there is a time when you must say no to the parties or another errand , and take a chill.  Yes, it is ok to have a desire for people to like you, but it isn't ok to constantly get by through granting every wish everyone asks of you. It is so important to rest. Not just sleep, but genuinely take time to repress & breathe. Praying is a fantastic first step . Expressing your rushing life to God and asking for wisdom and rest is so important. I've found blogging to be something I do to help my soul, but it also helps others. Journaling allows you to vent in a private way. Watch a movie. Read a book. Go sit outside and listen to music. Doodle and write poems. Do refreshing things. With a hectic schedule, it is such a vital investment to take a step back before you jump right in. God has shown us the importance of rest in Genesis .. After God finished creation, he rested. He took a step back and assessed the beauty in what he had created. God created you and me. He knows your schedule and he is not surprised you feel overwhelmed. He gave us a tool , the bible. His word is living and feeds your soul if you let it. My challenge for you and myself this week is to take a moment to pour into you. Talk to God and clear your head. It's that time in the semester that it is a downhill slope. Don't be overwhelmed by life, adjust it. Thanks for reading ! 
Love , 

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