Thursday, July 10, 2014

You have searched me & you know me

1 O LORD, you have searched me and you know me. 2 You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. 3 You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways. 4 Before a word is on my tongue you know it completely, O LORD. 5 You hem me in--behind and before; you have laid your hand upon me. 6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain.    ( Psalm 139:1-6)

These verses just speaks to me. It makes me so giddy inside. Kind of like when you are at the mall & some cute guy makes an effort to make eye contact & being a teenage girl, your heart just about sinks down to your feet. That is what we crave, to be pursued. We love someone to want to know our weird hobbies & somebody to share secrets with. As humans, we just love to be desired. That is why we jump on any opportunity to be shown to someone & why we want so badly to be in a relationship. I want Closeness. Chances are, if you are human, you want closeness too. The good news is that we are pursued by a God so much better than a boy at the mall. He wants us so badly. Our Jesus searches us. He never says " I am too busy to deal with your mistakes right now." I refrain from telling people my heart a lot of times because I hate the phrase , " In a minute." It gives me this feeling that my problems, though typically silly teenage issues, aren't important to them. But to God, they so are & he listens the second I cry out because he already knew my heart. He cares so much about me & so so much about you. He longs for us to tell him about our day before we go to sleep. God is so observant. God is so loving. God is so caring. Right now God is pondering through my millions of thoughts zooming through my head. Thoughts of the past, present, & future. It is crazy to think that someone so good & so power, I mean the King of Kings & Prince of Peace is willing to let me pour my heart out to him. That just amazes me in so many ways. I read this quote from one of my favorite authors that really explains the last verse to me.
People want to understand why God cares to know our thoughts. Why a God so powerful would mess around with listening to a long lists of praise, hurts, or just simply a conversation. I don't know the answer, I don't know why he loves me so much when I constantly fail, but I know he does. I know he is real & I know his word is true. He is better than our minds could ever imagine. 

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